Tuesday, September 16, 2008

My boss sent me an article to read about this woman with food allergies and how hard it can be to eat out. So I read the whole thing obviously because I relate, by having a child that we call "Bubble Boy". Well after reading the entire article I noticed that there were comments at the bottom, so I started reading those. One woman left a comment that made a lot of people angry....including me. Read below (then I will state my feelings)

My daughter entered kindergarten this year and the school has repeatedly sent home "requests" to not send any nut containing foods to school because of the children with allergies. So what, my daughter is supposed to suffer? She's a great eater and will try anything you put in front of her but when it comes to sandwiches she is addicted to pb&j. So why deprive her because someone else's kid has a problem. That's encroaching our civil liberties. Luckily, after speaking with the local school board I found out that they cannot prevent anyone from bringing pb&j to school so of course we pack it everyday. If your child has an allergy - YOU DEAL WITH IT. Don't expect my child to change her habits because your child has a problem.

Amanda, I hope your daughter grows up to be less self-centered and selfish than you.

My guess is that if this was your precious child, you'd expect the entire world to turn upside down. Actually I know it since you've already defined her "right" to eat peanut butter as a civil liberty. Unbelievable.

Oh well, thank goodness your daughter can get pb&j. If someone else dies, well that's just life.

Wow great attitiude Amanda ,no wonder people don't get along anymore , that the value of peanut butter is far greater than human life

As a response to those ignorant people who are not faced with any allergic repurcussions in their lives, will never get it until they go through it either with their children or develop something on their own as their immune system changes every so often. It is ridiculous for me to understand how people choose to think that those "allergic" individuals becomes a hassle for those that are not allergic. Children in particular that are in school with a peanut allergy as an example could face death if unaware they even have this allergy. Schools should really be considered "peanut-free". Who cares about a pb&j sandwhich anyway, it's overrated! I have no tolerance for those of you who are IGNORANT to NOT understand the repercussions involved if a child in particular should come into contact with milk, peanut, shellfish, etc. I encourage all parents to undergo allergy testing to be more cautious

Amanda, My son does not have any allergies however attends a school that is peanut free...you need to understand there are alternatives to PB, like soy butter, takes exactly the same and the kids love it just as much as the real thing...they can not make you stop making your daughter pb&j but you need to be mature about the issue and realize that not only is this a food allergy it is one of the very few airborne ones that can have the same effect as the child eating it, just by your daughter eating and possibly playing with a child with an allergy you have put them at risk...you should respect the "requests" your daughters school is making.



So you would rather have another child end up in the hospital or die, rather than deprive your little girl of a sandwich? That's teaching her how to get along with others.

there were many more...but I will stop there....

Okay as you can see that amanda woman pissed quite a few people off. Now, I can definitely understand her frustration. It is very hard for people to understand something they don't know. Until we came across all of Matthew's issues we didn't understand either. I do however think it is very sad of the woman to be so inconsiderate, we are talking about small children here, not teenagers or adults. She stated that it is their problem not hers or her daughters, but what if it was her daughter that was eating a pb&j sandwich and had peanut butter on her hands then touched a child that is allergic and that child stops being able to breathe. Then who's problem is it? My child is "trained" he can recite the list of things he is allergic to just as well as I can, and I have worked really hard at making sure of it. I can protect him when he is with me, but obviously I can not be with him at school all day. It scares me to think of all the things that could go wrong. Matthew's allergies have seemed to get worse the more he is exposed, and we find new things all the time that he is allergic to. I have to send his nap time blankets in a huge Ziploc bag because he is highly allergic to Gain laundry detergent and I wouldn't be able to know if someone else washes their kids blankets in that. I guess I am just rambling, but my point is that the woman who is choosing to bitch about not being able to send her child to school with a pb & j (even though her sorry self does it anyway) should be grateful that she is lucky enough to have a healthy child that can consume anything she chooses. Matthew loved peanut butter as a baby (before I realized that he was allergic, scary I know...cause I gave him pb crackers all of the time) and now he will never know the joy of eating a Reese's pb cup. It is very hard to accommodate so many allergies and stressful at times. What do you feed a child for breakfast when they are allergic to Milk, Eggs, Soy, Wheat? Poor thing eats a lot of bacon or dry cereal. I also think it is sad for Matthew to have to question most of the foods he is about to eat. "Mom am I allergic to mayonnaise?" "Yes, Matthew but not miracle whip." "Mom, does this candy have peanuts in it?" Okay I guess you get the point...

Thursday, September 11, 2008

I remember...

After I lost Madee I went to the cemetery every single day for a year. I took it very seriously, that's the only thing I thought about every day, how to make sure I worked in 45 minutes to an hour and a half of time everyday to spend at the cemetery. There was even one day at work that I had a huge crying breakdown because the other manager had not shown up from his meeting so that I could leave, and it was getting late, I drove as fast as I could to get there. I even drove off on the side of the road that day where traffic had stopped, all I cared about was making it there, and I did. 
Anyhow, today is 6 years ago since her funeral. About a week after the funeral my mom and I were at the cemetery watering the grass we had just planted, when a man by the name of Harold Wettig drove up. He got out of the car and started to walk toward us. He asked "Are you the family of 'Sugar Puddin'?" We were a little taken back and holding back the tears we said "yes we are." He then handed me a envelope, I opened it and inside were these two pictures that he had taken the day after Madee's funeral. I was so grateful, we hadn't thought to take pictures of all the flowers (well what we left at the cemetery, we brought many home as well it was amazing how many people showed love for Madee.) Plus there are a lot of things that I don't remember that went on during all of this. Most of the events I just remember bits and pieces, which is for the best. The parts I do remember I wish I didn't. 
Well, back on track, Harold told us that it is just something he does for families after someone is buried at that cemetery. His wife is buried there too. He also gave me a copy of a story that was written about him in the newspaper. I will never forget his kindness and I am forever grateful for the pictures he captured. 
In ten minutes this day will be officially over and tomorrow will be another day I wake up without my baby...

Tuesday, September 9, 2008

The finished project!

Sorry it has taken me so long to post this picture. Here is the first ever project that Matthew turned in to school. I had fun making it, I just wish I could have had a bigger piece of paper cause I could have done so much more to it. We went to back to school night tonight, it was really cute to see the things Matthew has made in class so far.

Saturday, September 6, 2008

Pictures from today...

Thank you to my friends and family who still remember, that means so much to me!

We always write a message to madee on balloons and then let them go to her. This was something we did at her funeral with tons of pink balloons. 

Friday, September 5, 2008

10 Years!

Today is Carlos & my 10 year anniversary! We haven't celebrated it for the past 5 years because of what tomorrow is. It's a little hard to try and be happy during this part of the year. However, I couldn't let this day pass without ackknowledging it. 10 years is huge! We have been through a LOT together, happy, sad, the unthinkable. We have become stronger most people don't make it through losing a child, it tears their relationship apart. Instead it made us stronger, it made us realize the importance of each day. That's why we don't like to do anything without Matthew. Most parents can't wait to have a night out alone, we never feel that way. That's why I still love him so much, he loves being a parent as much as I do.

Thursday, September 4, 2008

It always seems to come back...

It's here again....September...gosh I hate September....I can't think of one thing, not one that I like about it. It is the hardest time of the year for me. Even though in 2 1/2 days it will be 6 years since I experienced the WORST day of my life, some how every year feels like it just happened when the day rolls around. I never believed that I would make it 6 years without my baby girl, *sigh* I never thought I'd make it through the night without her. If anyone wonders how I have or is thinking to them self right now "I couldn't do it", well I never thought I would be able to either. I quickly learned that when something like that happens to you no one comes and gives you a choice. I didn't get to pick 6 years ago to stop living my life, well I guess in a sense I could have, but you know what I mean. My only option for the last 6 years has been to wake up every morning and breathe, so that's what I do. I get up every morning take in a deep breath kiss my little boy (don't dare tell him I said little) I some how make it through the rest of the day get in bed at night and kiss that little boy again, knowing how lucky I truly am to have such a wonderful miracle. Then it's starts over again. It is still very hard and very painful...I think about things that I miss out on everyday. Madee would have started 1st grade this year!

Kiss your babies every day, make sure you always tell them you love them (even if it's when they are sleeping.) Life is unexpected and unfair a lot of the time, be sure not to regret the time you have.


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